Dealing with Loss
posted by H. Dan Smith, EdD, MFT

Vicklo, 1990

Five "D"s for unsuccessfully dealing with loss:

1.Denial of the loss;
2.Distortion of the experience by overglorifying or overidealizing it;
3.Denigration of activities or relationships connected to the experience as a way to avoid pain;
4.Distraction to avoid thinking about the loss;
5.Detachment from activities or relationships abruptly as an illusion of being empowered or in control.

Five "D"s for successfully dealing with loss:

1.Determine ways to make the transition a gradual process (not always possible);
2.Discover the significance activities, people, and places have had in your life;
3.Describe this significance to others;
4.Delight in what has been gained and what may lie ahead;
5.Define areas of continuity in your life.

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